Sunday, October 23, 2011

Grandma in Memoriam


I had a dream last weekend about my grandma. I had been meaning to visit one last time; I knew she wasn't doing well. In my dream, I was teaching at my new job when she came for a "surprise" visit. I was very surprised; afterall, I hadn't thought she was well enough to travel. We embraced, and with tears running down my cheeks, I told her how much I loved her. She said, "I know how busy you've been and how you wanted to visit so I came to you instead!" She reassured me that everything was fine. When I woke up, there was a voicemail from my dad with the news of my grandma's passing. Now I know she came to me in my dream to say goodbye.


My grandma was my hero. For the longest time, I didn't have a hero; I don't think I really knew what a hero was until I became an adult. Then, I realized that every time I looked at my grandma, she embodied everything a hero represented. I admired her, looked up to her, and wanted to be just like her. She had so many qualities I wanted to emulate. She was fiercely independent and not afraid to march to the beat of her own drummer. She was always positive and never scarce on smiles. When we would go out to eat, her upbeat attitude and high-energy would always astound us. We would joke to the water, "We'll have what she's having!"


She taught me to smile and exchange pleasantries with those around me. She taught me that you can live alone and not be lonely. She taught me that you should always be true to yourself. And she taught me that happiness isn't something that falls in your lap; happiness is a choice you make. I will miss her sloppy kisses. I will miss her redundant stories, retold so many times I knew them all by heart. I will miss her constant humming of old tunes, sung completely off-key. I miss Grandma terribly, but I will never forget the memories or the lessons she taught me.

7 comments:

Mike said...

That is really cool your Grandma visited you in your dream Rachel, really really cool.

Diana said...

Thoughts and prayers to you and your family at this difficult time. Time tribute to obviously someone who played a big part of your life!

Nice of her to make one last visit to you....

Christi said...

My condolences to you and your family. Your grandma sounds like a great woman!

Karen said...

so sorry to hear it Rachel... Love that you had that special dream about her. thinking of you and your family.

Wes said...

agreed. very cool. love it when they set the bar high for the rest of us!

Colleen said...

My thoughts are with you Rachel... she sounds like an amazing lady!

HECTOR said...

If you are the type who believe that everything in this world does not stop, do not hesitate to return to laugh with her. How lucky you are to be able to speak well of it.